All In One Day

New eyeglasses and new car - all on the same day. I think I'm going to like my new glasses. They fit well and are a little more stylish than what I've had. And I think I'm going to like my new 2010 Prius V a lot. It will take awhile to get comfortable with all the bells and whistles, but meanwhile, it drives really great. Hey, if you live near me, come on over and see it! I plan to test it on a long road trip when I take it to ND in October. I'll see if it really does get 48-51 mpg like they say it does. One of the things I like best - I never have to dig out my keys. So long as the key is on me or in my bag, I can lock and unlock the doors, and even start and stop the car. Now is that convenient, or what! I even like the color; it's called Blizzard Pearl and has the metallic flecks in it. Roomy and comfortable. Navigation. Satellite radio. All around good car. And it better be. This is my second to last car. It has to get me into retirement, when I will then buy my final car for this life. And the Avalon? Well, I can take only so much grief in a week's time - I decided to hold onto it for awhile. Gosh, it's been with me for over 10 years. I can't just walk away, as if we never had a relationship....

$5.73

Last night I walked across the street from my hotel and had dinner at "Salsa's", an authentic locally-owned Mexican restaurant. New building, nice interior, great service. I had two chicken tacos, one soft shell and one hard shell (both very, very good), a basket of chips and salsa, (of which I could only eat a few), and a dessert (which was huge, and I could only eat about half). I was stuffed with yummy, tasteful food. Then I got the check - $5.73. I'd say that's quite a bargain! Next time I go to Mountain Home, I'm giving them my business again - with another good tip.

Memories

They are going to be sharing memories tomorrow morning at the funeral home and the lunch afterwards. How I wish I was there to hear them! My older siblings have childhood memories of him; memories from the time he was born, memories of his early years. I have no idea what he was like as a child or as a young teen. I'm not even sure what he was like as a young adult. I really only knew LeRoy from around age 50 or so. How sad is that! How much I missed! If I could go back and do it over again, I would have reached out to him very early on; I would have made an effort to know him sooner and better. I know my life would be much richer if I had done that.

As I make my three-hour drive to the airport tomorrow morning, my heart and mind will be in Wisconsin. And I know many others will be feeling the same way. I hope he knows -- and understands.

Mountain Home

Mountain Home, Arkansas. What a beautiful place - right in the Ozarks. A local drove me around tonight and I discovered lots of lovely places. There are four or five rivers and a lake right within Mountain Home. Anyone who loves to hunt or fish would love this area. It is surrounded by towns with some unusual names, though. Names like Yellville, Gassville, Salesville, Pyatt, Snow, and...and Flippin. You drive by the Flippin gas station and the Flippin library. Kinda reminds me of a town next to one we used to live in. It was called Grudgeville. It was called Grudgeville because there were two prominent families who held onto their grudges against each other for decades, even while they were intermarrying. What fun it is to see such unique parts of this great country we live in!

LeRoy

LeRoy Oscar Sinness – firstborn son, carrier of his father’s name, oldest brother. Today he left us. As I sit in seat 10B, flying over the prairies, I hurt. Another brother is gone – prematurely, it seems to me. He would have been 68 next month.

LeRoy was 10 years old when I was born. For the first half of my life I didn’t know him very well. Then we moved to the same state in which he lived and we started to connect in a new way. I’m so thankful we did! I discovered what a wonderful man he was. I found out that he was thoughtful and kind. He was always so supportive of me and believed in me. And he seemed to have such common sense about everything!

On his birthday, September 27, I will share memories. But for now, I need to say that all of us who knew him experienced a big loss today. And it’s hard.

This picture was taken this past spring.

Lovely Day in Estes Park

We went to Estes Park today. Beautiful community and much cooler than here on the plains. They had a "Heritage Festival", with lots of displays of the very early settlement days. The drive there and back is breathtakingly beautiful. May I never take for granted the beauty that surrounds me! 97 degrees in Thornton. Thank God for central air conditioning!!

Mom - I Wish I Knew You Better

I've been thinking about my mom a lot. Mom has always been a fighter with strong opinions and, often, an untamed tongue. Up until a few months ago she took care of her own checkbook and managed her own investments. She will be 93 next month. She fought to keep her independence and always made her own decisions about her life - when to sell the farm, when to give up her driver's license and sell her car, when to move into assisted living, and yes, when to move into the nursing home. She always said she would never move to a nursing home, but when the time came, she made the decision - on her timetable and in her own way. She moved in six months ago today. And she is failing. In those six months she went from taking care of herself within her own room to needing assistance even with using the bathroom. Her walking during physical therapy is half what it was. Her hearing is getting even worse. It is getting harder for her to stay focused on a train of thought during a conversation. Worse of all, it seems like she has quit fighting, quit caring, and has lost interest in nearly everything. Is it because she has lost what little control she wanted? Is there nothing more for her to live for? Not long ago she was buying blouses, buying dolls, eating with friends, going shopping at the grocery store and at Walmart. Now she eats a little, sleeps a little, watches TV a little, sleeps a little, reads a little, sleeps a little...and waits for the next visitor or the next phone call. I wonder what she thinks about. Is she revisiting happier and healthier times in her mind? Or is she longing to be released from this life and join Oscar on the other side? Is she dreaming anything during her many segments of sleep? I wish I knew. I wish I could be there with her - even if only to sit quietly in her room so she wouldn't spend so much time alone. I wish she wasn't so old. And, sometimes, I wish she would just quietly and painlessly cross over.....